Hawai’i
June 2016
It’s warm in Hawai’i. It gets warm at home in the northeast too. But the Hawai’ians, to all appearances, are smarter. “Formal wear” in Hawai’i can be an Aloha shirt. In most of the rest of the country, “formal wear” includes a shirt too, but also another, thicker layer on top of that, and for the men, a fabric noose called a necktie.
I am talking, of course, above the waist. Hey, my eyes are up here.
When you wear an Aloha shirt, you don’t necessarily have to look like a 1980s Tom Selleck or a 1960s Elvis Presley. You could look like a 21st century Jimmy Buffett. Or like any contemporary well-heeled sartorial adept.
Here’s a tip. If you want to look like a tourist, wear an Aloha shirt in bright colors and loud designs and don’t pay more than forty bucks for the shirt. Real Hawai’ians wear the genuine item which can set you back a hundred bucks. Many are printed with their floral patterns on the inside so that the colors, to all appearances, are muted.
There are times however when it is appropriate to wear more formal attire. When Lisa and I were prepping for our trip to Hawai’i, my friend Mike gave us this intel, in the form of a riddle…
What do they call a man who wears a necktie in Hawai’i?
The accused.